Consent

Image result for shutterstock image for consent

She said no.

Then why?

If she said no, then why did he do it?

What made him think that consent is given by saying no.

We as a country are known for our religious and moral values, for our rich heritage, diverse cultures, and traditions that we still follow, well at least the negative ones we do follow. A country where on one hand women have been worshipped as Goddesses and even the Earth has been referred as “Mother Earth” and on the other hand they have and are still being killed even before they could crawl out of their mother’s womb. Where domestic violence is the story of every domestic household. Where women are sexually assaulted, molested and harassed. Where if a girl wears short skirts or comes home late then she’s of questionable character. But what about the man who parties till 3 in the morning and comes home at 5 in an inebriated state. Does anyone ever question his character?

But maybe that’s okay because he is a “Man”, isn’t it?

If a woman is sexually assaulted by a man or a group of men, then her character is questioned not only in our courts but also in our society. Even if she gets justice by our judicial system after being harassed by police and the accused’s solicitor, the society still holds her responsible for everything. They’ll still raise questions as to why was the girl out so late at night but they’ll never question him.

Women are still being forced by their own families and our law enforcement bodies to stay quiet on such matters. Many women are faced with such terrible dilemma.

Our law enforcement bodies have terribly failed at protecting the dignity of women. 

Okay, I won’t complain about equality. I won’t become a feminist and raise slogans against you. I won’t go out for candle march. I won’t even ask you to protect me. I’m staying away from you so can you please do the same. All I’m asking you is to keep your eyes off me. Just that much. NOTHING ELSE. 

Our values and the way our society interprets them never fails to astonish me. We as a society have failed at teaching our boys the basic lesson, i.e. to respect women. Let’s focus on the upbringing of our boys for a change. Let’s question them when they come home late. Let’s teach them the rules and regulations of the society we live in. Let’s  start teaching them that when a woman says NO, she’s not giving her consent. Let’s teach them the basic and the most important thing, the difference between a YES and  NO.

Dilemma

P.S. I”m preparing for an important test that is on 8th of October. So I might not be able to go through your posts or reply to your comments. But I’ll try to spare some time to write everyday. Please be patient with me. I’ll get back to you as soon as practicable.

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23 thoughts on “Consent

  1. this is not only happening your country but in many countries around the world. it is an epidemic problem that needs to be addressed and strongly so NOW! no does mean no. and it should stop there. keep up the fight.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Yeah I know it’s almost like a global problem but I wanted to talk about my country only because we have been worshipping goddesses since thousands of years. That’s what the irony is on one hand you worship women on the other you kill them for things like dowry.

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      1. i am not against what you said.. it is not at all gender specific..it is not at all about physical torture or mental torture..
        we are living in a patriarchal society where it is rare to find mr housewives… and that dominance nature has mis leaded many, made them ignore their true self..

        Liked by 2 people

      2. Agree but things are getting better and may be we see what we look for. Also note that we get a better view of the events when we try to step back and look it to it in a macro perspective. Pinne ellam depends on the social circumstances **we can always blame the society** but having said that, we must try to focus on improving ourselves and start loving ourselves, eventually we will be treating others the way we wants to be get treated. Self respect not dominance that matters. Reading can help a lot, to get approach a same situation with different attentions.

        Liked by 2 people

  2. Yes, this is so true, and it’s a concept which we must get rid of not simply in your own country but in so many as well. I have seen this sort of conversation before and it makes my blood boil, it’s like in Latin American videos too, some women have to practically be nude to get somewhere into the media whilst the men are always well dressed. Is this out of choice or rather a disguised mannerism to take advantage of women’s bodies? This needs to be shared, thanks for writing this. It’s a real eye-opener!

    Like

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